I have decided:

I am going to become a music critic, since i am already doing at as an amateur am i may as well get paid for it!

I am not going to work as much as i do, at work.

Workmates are not friends, they are being nice to make their jobs easier. It's a lesser form of prostitution, although some do cross that line. No one in particular in mind......... no it's not one of you.

Ricky Lee deserved to go, she was shit. That greasy midget Anthony should be next. My money is on Chanel, cause she looks like Miss J (or so they say).

Nicky Hilton looks better brunette than blonde. This gentleman does not prefer blondes.

as i start my climb into "middle management" i am astounded by the number of, quite plainly, fucking idiots i come across!
The ratio of "chiefs" to "indians" is severly skewed. The company we represent has whole departments devoted to absolutely nothing at all, just writing useless policy and contradicting themselves.
I hate seeing on the news that people are losing their jobs due to cutbacks and economic rationalism but i take some comfort in the fact that surely some of the losses might come from that bloated section of the workforce which really, essentially does fuck all and get paid a large wage to do so.

on a brighter note, our little nest is coming along nicely. I replaced the gutter on the carport on saturday. Of course no rain is forecast for a while so I won't get a chance to see if it works or not

Roll up a joint, we're gettin the band back together.

Oh yes, get your earplugs ready, the worlds loudest and crappest band are hitting the road again. For one night only at the Territorian Hotel, the creaps will rock your world and damage your ears. We had to change the name so the bass player we booted out wouldn't see we reformed without him. We have actually been practicing and listening to the large amounts of "positive critisism", that's mostly in the form of "shut up" and "you call that music?" Sept the 3rd is the date to stick in your Palms and Filofax's.

Hope to see you there, if only for a drink before we start playing, you can leave after that.

Forgive me reader for i have sinned, it's been ages since my last blog.

I agree with MissJ and Bsharp, it's hard to blog, communicate with people or generally stay in the loop when you spend all day staring at a screen.

There has been a bit happening in our little country town. We are almost finished renovating room #2. We are getting the routine sorted out. Miss H likes to paint, i like to prep. I'm not sure who gets the better end of the deal but it seems to work out.

We have bought our ute. She's a real beauty. XE Falcon, power steering, auto and the air sort of works. I spent most of saturday sorting out the rust and tidying up. The seat is absolutely rooted and will be replaced as soon as i can. Either a really fat man of a hungry dog had the car and the seat is down to the steel frame. Someone has skinned Fozzie bear and used the pelt to fill up the seat a bit but it still pinches your ass and tears your jeans. The good news is that the radio is stuck on Triple M, you have no choice but to get the complete uteing experience.

The weather has been truly shitful and cold. It rained pretty well all day yesterday and with the leaking windscreen on abovementioned ute dripping onto Miss H's legs, hilarity ensued!

I do apologise for my slackness in keeping contact, Bsharp i promise i'll ring this week. May be saturday night at 11:55 but it will be this week.
Miss J, good luck!

Brown Bread

"we're all gonna die someday, lord, we're all gonna die someday"

Got the news this morning that a colleague crashed his bike and died yesterday. Sad, had a young family and was, bad cliche i know, full of life. Happened up near Clarendon on a notorious bend, i have had the odd wobble up there.
It's very subdued here today even though he didn't work here we all knew him well and will miss him.
Makes you think about your own mortality and certainly makes me think more carefully about zapping though the hills at high speed.
I don't think it will stop me, only make me more wary and careful. Part of being involved, even on the fringes, in a dangerous hobby is that you will lose the odd mate along the way. We all know the risks and take every chance to avoid injury but accidents happen and there isn't much you can do about that.

It's Not Rocket Science.

The ancient Romans had plumbing, the idea that water doesn't run uphill is not a new one. Unfortunately that idea musn't have been in the trade school textbook for the plumbers that did our stormwater. On Saturday, in the pissing rain, I was out there clearing the drains only to discover that the nimrods have decided to defy the laws of physics and run the drains uphill. Now i need to dig them all up and relay them. Anyone want any 150mm asbestos pipe, i have about 40 feet, ebay maybe?
Whilst i was doing all this i though i should have a look at the gutters. When i got on the roof i saw that ours was the only house in the street with a liberal coating of moss. I actually felt bad that our roof was messy??? So i scraped some off but gave up when the rain and wind got too scary.

Other'n that the weekend was quite peaceful. Spent some quality time with the Playstation, drank some beer, watched the Bill and hung out with the girl. Most restful!

Head soundtrack.

mix between:
The new Kylie song (very breathy and smooth like sex when you're trying to impress)

Hillary Duff (feels like being 12 again, without the pimples and slightly more awkward)

and the Darkness (that falsetto gets me everytime)

I'm having one fucked up day. Between that and 2 iced coffees and a can of coke i'm hyper.

Tired.

what a week at work it has been and there's one more day to go. God save the queen for giving us monay off work. Bless her socks.

We are going almost 24hrs here at the minute. The routine of sleep/work/sleep/work is becoming a bit of a grind.

We had the best fog here this morning, really thick and wet. It's cool to be driving to work and looking out over the city and not being able to see anything. Like being on a holiday cause there's no familliar surroundings. I remember holidays, those endless weeks when it felt like school would never go back......

The View From The Service Desk.

Here's today's thoughts:

The corporate tree is an oleander: By all means try to climb but wash your hands afterwards.

Every action has an equal and opposite....: Demand something from someone and they are more likely to not give it you. I think this is why women (some) get what they want. They just ask, not demand or insist, just ask. Batting eyelids and chest pushed out may help, but it's mostly the asking.

If the boss is in a bad mood, best not mention that you stuffed something up. Actually, have a sickie and watch Lizzie Maquire.

Who makes up The Matrix songwriting team?

Apparently in the Navy you can sail the seven seas: I thought there were more than that. Does it include the Timor and Tasman? Was that written before the charting of the southern hemisphere?

The pressing issues of our time.

The Sleep Of The Righteous.

How good was My Restaurant Rules last night. That fuckin Greek idiot was totally shattered when he lost "his" restaurant. Even the cries of "Go Melbourne" were choked with the snot of a loser. There was much debate on the couch as to who deserved to win. My vote went to Perth because they were a good team. It was great to see justice done!!

When the cats out of town the rats get down OR Is it hometime yet.

The boss is "working from home" today. Does that mean he's in his dressing gown and watching springer on cable or he's actually suited up at his desk fielding calls and making those important decisions like, we need a sign in the kitchen to remind everyone to put their dishes in the dishwasher? He loves to laminate, my boss.

Weekend: Painting, a little bit of sanding, murdering wildlife (i'm sorry but a red back the size of a german shepard is not welcome at casa Glenung and i was too slow to belt the snake i found behind the shed), Saturday night started nicely with chicken crimpy biscuits and playstation then turned a shade of ugly at the pub. Too many beers and too much change for the jukebox. Kickstart my Heart got turned down by the management. They had "there's no other way" by Blur. Bought back very many underage memories!!
Other gems were:
"wrap me up" by Alex Party (i don't know why i like that song)
"Betty Boo" (made me think of miss J for some reason)
"Opposites Attract" (ahhh my first kiss at the ice arena)

I don't think they'll invite us back in a hurry!

Saw Tim Rogers and the Temperance Union last week. Very cool show. The little feral girls clap dancing up the front was a highlight for me. Timmy is a real performer. He signed my single and picked out a t-shirt size for me. Very affable and funny. I always thought he'd be a bit of a wanker but he was really nice. It was very exciting for me, meeting one of my guitar heroes.

The other big news is that our tv is on the blink. It works ok if you give it a whack. I finally discovered a use for my trade school text books!! Hurts much less than using your hand to hit the little bugger.
Made it very frustrating to watch My Restaurant Rules and see Adelaide get booted off. Yes, fuck off, i am watching reality tv and enjoying it. Their reality is sometimes much better than mine. Especially between 7.30 and 5.30 monday to friday. Or when i'm tackling a redback with just a shotgun and a piece of 2x4 and the spider is taller than me. Seriously, the Hills are a dangerous place. No wonder those Blackwood people are fucked up, they live in fear of being consumed by millipedes ( thank you so much to the dickhead who bought one of those thing over to Australia, thank you so so much) or spiders. The lil gecko's and skinks are cute but you can have the snakes.

Back to work, all of you!

Our house is a mini version of the block.
We are renovating, i repeat we are renovating. Run for you lives.
I kind of enjoy it, you're up the ladder applying No More Gaps to the cornices and singing(though i was told it sounded like whistling) along to the latest Green Circles album, gives a man time to think about life...... and how you wish you could take the life of the dolt who applied the last lot of no more gaps. When it's all done and you can stand back and peel the top off a cold Pale Ale and admire the work it's all worthwhile. Makes all the broken fingernails and dust in your eyes worth it.

Have been very slack with keeping up with absent friends lately and to all of you i apologise! Lil Adelaide has been a busy place for us the last few weeks. Dinners, housework, guitar lessons, band practice, cat behaviour modification all in the life of two young hills dwellers.

Met the crazy neighbour last week. I found all about her son and how he's studying and that he's currently asleep and that we'll all have a bbq. Thanks but no thanks crazy woman.

Ahhh the post moving brain fade.
we moved all our worldly possessions on saturday, driving the truck was way fun!
No breakages apart from my Fender Twin amp is playing up now. Fingers crossed it's nothing too serious.
Cat is settling in to a bad routine of sleeping all day and partying all night.
We are both tired and looking forward to the weekend (girl not cat)
Housewarming TBA.

fuck work.
fuck clients.
fuck my retard of a boss, you know who you are.
fuck the dickheads who sit within 2 feet south of me but are oblivious to any goings on in my wind tunnel of an office.
fuck my paperwork forever blowing off my desk.
fuck every second wednesday when the insult of a pay slip finds it's way onto the huge pile of shit on my desk.
fuck my desk.
love the old couple in my waiting area, he looks as if he has had a stroke and is in a wheelchair. She is doting on him and feeding him the froth from her capachino. They look like they have been together forever. It's truly beautiful and reminds me that there is more to life than coming to work at first light and battling every single person that walks though the door, staff or client.
love the bright sunny day and the wind that means that i should be out sailing.
love that i have my first guitar lesson in ten years tonght.
love the fact that my partner love me and hates my job too.
love my partner.

Hi ho, Hi ho it's off to work we go.

Ahh monday morning and the office is full of the buzz of what we all did on the weekend. Conversation turns to footy and drinking (we are in the motor trade after all). Yes i did get mildly drunk but not too unruly on the weekend but i don't wish to share that with the idiots i work with. Actually this morning i wish they weren't here. I would get so much more done without all the politics and she said he said bullshit. Not to mention the inane football shit they all talk about. For fucks sake it's just a game. Played by 40 men who all shower together but oh no they're not gay, they're mens men. They like to rape and assault, they're tough, no wait tuff.

well we are on the move. We have bought a house in the hills and are gearing up for the move.
Was doing some packing and tidying last night in preparation and listening to Juiliana Hatfield. Kind of got me thinking, what happened to that bunch of people that were around in my later high school years. Evan Dando, Juiliana, Babes In Toyland, Nick Dalton and all of those other "angsty" people.
Liz Phair is still going but is now featured on the Queer Eye soundtrack. Funny how when you are on a CD for a gay tv show you can be seen as selling out, what a topsy turvey world we live in. Is anyone still making that kind of music? or did we all grow out of it? hmmmm
And another thing, Daria. Is the ABC ever going to show that again. I lived for that show. Daria was cute.

man, you need to be some kind of friggin computer nerd to do all this stuff. Have chewed about 5 pens to destruction trying all this html stuff and adding links and comments. It never looked this hard!! I thought this stuff must be easy. Hopefully now with all my new found computer skills i'm a little closer to free porn forever.

Woah! here i am yada yada (does everybody do this post as their first blog?)

I want you all to know that this will be the lamest, most boring, least frequently updated, most boring and lamest blog in the history of blogging. Now we've got that straight we can proceed.

Thought i should start a blog cause everyone else is, kind of like smoking really. now i have a pack a day habit.
I guess it's another excuse to sit at my crap covered desk and avoid being dragged into converstions about the footy or heaven forbid, working!

so kids, strap yourselves in for a bumpy ride operation blog is about to commence